The Summer of Water

I feel like without really planning it, this summer has turned into the summer of water…to put it obviously. From splash parks to fishing, creek exploration to swim lessons, this summer is shaping up to be a wet one. I think it has a combination to do with it being so hot so early this summer,  my love of water, and Emma’s growing love of water. I am in my element around water. If I’m not mistaken, my sign (Scorpio) is a water sign. Emma just seems to love being in/ around the water as does her dad. We’ve found two awesome splash parks near our house and she asks to go to them daily (or play with her water table.) We sprung for a $3 sprinkler with a million different, awesome settings but so far she hasn’t gotten into it (although she will run like a loon through the splash park.)

The other thing is, Emma starts swim class next weekend, the day after her pool birthday party. I’m excited and a little nervous. Nervous because she hasn’t taken a swim class since she was like 7 or 8 months old. Not that I’m worried she won’t “remember” the good old days of yore and be able to pull off her baby back stroke like she did then, but rather, I’m more concerned that she will get frustrated/ not listen to her instructor. I can foresee this happening because so far every time we have gone to a pool, all she wants to do is jump in it. Like literally she finds a set of stairs and will climb up jump in and climb up again (cause you know, no one else needs to use the stairs.) We have asked her to kick her feet and blow bubbles and she will from time to time but listening is such a huge problem right now that it’s a guessing game from one moment to the next as to what will happen. 

I also feel a little guilty that we have not exposed her to the pool enough. We went a handful of times last year but we’re not “pool people” I guess. Like those families that live at the pool and their children basically go from womb to swim team….yeah not us. But I do want Emma to be comfortable in the water so that she can enjoy swimming…not just monopolizing a set of metal stairs. Her school’s summer program also takes the kids to the pool once a week starting in July. I have no clue what this pool looks like or how deep it is but I trust her teachers. Because of this though, I really wanted her to have some solid exposure to swimming. I’m an ok swimmer, her dad is a pretty good swimmer. I’m not asking for a Michael Phelps here, well maybe a Missy Franklin :) I wouldn’t mind becoming one of those swim team families, but I hear you have to get up super early and stand around for hours to see your kid swim for a few minutes.

Anyway, we shall see where our new found love of water goes. I’m for sure hoping for more fishing trips, a lot of fun at the pool, and of course an amazing beach trip in about a month! PS. Stay tuned for the post about my 3 year old’s potential train wreck birthday party. 

While You Sleep

While you sleep I arrange your toys nice and neat

I pack your lunch, kiss your head

I check on you, snuggling in bed

While you sleep, laundry gets done

Crafts are made, sometimes mommy goes for a run

I plan the next day, I schedule some fun

I prepare for the week, sunblock for the sun

While you sleep, I vacuum and sweep

I dust and fold, I worry about you getting too old

I enjoy time with your dad, I sometimes enjoy some wine

I know you are resting peacefully, you are calm, you are fine

While you sleep, I organize the toy bin

And wait for the moment you yell for me to come in

I roll my eyes, not this again…

But then something happens, you’re all cozy and warm

And then you sweetly say with a yawn..

I missed you mommy and I hold you, knowing our time together is not long

enough.

The Kids You See At a School Performance

Now I’m sure this topic has come up before. I haven’t run across this particular genre but you get the idea. Every time you go to an event: birthday party, soccer game, play group, a classroom setting, you get the usual set of kidos that fall into familiar categories be it the “tattle tell” or the “complainer” or “the kid who talks way too much” there just always seems to be one of each of these in a crowd (this applies to adults as well I might add). 

So I entered new territory last week, an event that was saturated with such high expectations, nostalgia, and overall excitement that I literally could barely stand the wait.

Yes, I am talking about Emma’s first ever stage performance!!! Now it should be known that I do come from a theatrical family (however I was always a more behind the scenes type.) I never liked being on stage but everyone else in my family has been in some type of show or another (even my very shy brother). I graced the stage once in the epic eight grade musical of “A Christmas Carol.” The “all-star” cast included myself as the nephew Fred’s wife (literally that was her name in the script which greatly disturbed me as a young budding feminist who wished her character’s identity did not depend on that of her husband.) 

Ok I digress…. Anyway overall, I think theater and everything that goes along with it (set design, sound, lighting, the music, the action) is great for anyone to experience so I was glad Emma had a chance. I’ve seen home footage of kiddie performances before so I sort of knew what to expect but it’s ten times more amazing in person because you get to see all of the kids doing crazy, off-the-wall things. From that, I found myself noticing several kids standing out for their “unique” behavior (don’tworry Emma was one of them.) So without further adue, I give you the kids you see at a school performance:

- The nose picker: Definitely not the worst offender but you can’t help but feel somewhat sorry for their parents (it could happen to anyone really so maybe you are just grateful it wasn’t your kid.) It is one of the most entertaining parts of the show as you see the kid slowly start to move their finger toward the gold mine. Then anticipation builds as they hover close for several seconds and then…WAM! After they’re in, you realize they aren’t pulling their finger out of itscomfy cocoon for the rest of the show. Singing whilepicking is a talent.

- The kid that is totally doing their own thing: Silly hand gestures, check, funky dancing, double check, Billy…yeah Billy is running up and down the stage in back banging on pots and pans like a punk rock drummer. This kid unknowingly steals the show with their enthusiastic antics. You hope he doesn’t end up throwing the wooden spoon prop out into the audience (or well maybe you do, the show has been in a lull these last few minutes.)

- The “overly excited” kid: This is it! This is the moment! This is the kid who is totally in their element! They eat, sleep, and dream Beyonce and already have their own YouTube channel so this “community theater thing” is small potatoes. They are the ones who jump the highest, sing the loudest, and over exaggerate every choreographed hand gesture to a t. So they knock a few kids over in the process? No one stands in the way of this future Broadway star. Give me the lead or give me death! 

- The “deer in the headlights” kid: This kid is staring off into space not sure what is going on. Even though they probably practiced the 2 minute song 50 times, this kid has no clue why the class is singing or how they got onto a stage. These kids were the first to get trampled by overly excited kid.

- And finally….The shirt puller upper: Yes we have made it to Emma’s category. I guess kids fidget during shows and idle hands take over and the next thing you know…my kid is standing there topless for the world. It was the longest minute or two of my life watching and not being able to do anything. It was like a girlsgone wild nightmare for this feminist mom. Finally, her teacher made her way over and pulled Emma’sshirt down. I never thought my kid would be the “indecent exposure” kid but there you have it.

So now you know what to look for at your next Preschool musical theater extravaganza. And if you want any advice from me it would be….put an extra t-shirt on your kid!

Earning My Motherhood Badges

I haven’t written in a while but that doesn’t mean a lot hasn’t been going on. In fact, so much has happened that I needed some time away from this space to process it all. We started (and ended) looking for a house. We put it on hold again for now. We enthusiastically watched the entire series of the Walking Dead in one month (amazing but exhausting.) I’ve been busy working on Emma’s third birthday which I am hoping will be less stressful than last year although I caved and decided on an extended family and friends gathering. And of course there is my ever evolving Emma. I think with impending changes ahead (a move and who knows what else), I have been hyper focused on her. With the constant worry that we might not be able to have another child and the fact that moving will hinder our afternoons (and even our mornings) together, I have been holding on, perhaps too tight, to my little person.

Through all stages of childhood come different phases of coping and learning for moms (and dads). I seem to need to read and study as much as I can on each piece in order to feel prepared for it. That seems to be what gets me through as a type A loon. Here lately though I found a peaceful lull where I have just been enjoying Emma’s development as it progresses on its own. I gave up the hard core potty training and the tourcherous letter reviewing and we’ve all been the better for it. I’m happy to say with the exception of nights, Emma is potty trained! And just the other day she picked up something and asked what the letters were. Her curiosity and her understanding of concepts growsevery day. She will come to me with questions about routine tasks we’ve done a thousand times just because she finally noticed something about it she wanted to learn. 

She’s picking up a lot more on her feelings and the feelings ofthose around her too. She talks about the kids at school all the time and has begun to ask for a brother or sister pretty regularly. She really wants someone her age to play with (I guess she figured out mommy and daddy aren’t as cool as a bunch of 4 year olds.) She even asked if some kids could come over to the house to play. I don’t know any of the kids at her school too well yet or their parents so I’m not sure about that one. For this reason, I almost feel guilty picking her up from school now, rather than beating myself up for getting their a minute late. I’ve even stopped at the store on my way to pick her up to give her a few extra minutes to play with the kids. The other day, she asked to play with “the big kids” across the street. I reluctantly told her she could as long as her daddy went with her. 

I guess my new nonchalant, go with the flow, parenting is getting to me. I’m not ready for this new independent streak. I didn’t think it would come this soon. She’s still young enough that I believe all of the kids have good intentions but I know there will come a day when she gets hurt or teased and I want to be there for her and know just want to say. So yup, I’m back to reading up on that, like intensely. I want to have the kind of relationship with her where she feels comfortable talking to me. I want to give her good advice. Mostly, I want to be close to her.For now, I can’t get passed this independent stage (and a part of me might never). After sleep training, potty training, bottle weaning, teaching her what not to put in her mouth, teaching her not to hit, weathering tantrums, etc you’d think I’d be seasoned enough to take on the next challenge but I find that this next Motherhood badge, teaching independence and being ok with it, might just be the hardest one of all.

The Mom Quiz

As the cold winter days drag on pulling me into a seemingly endless abyss, I find myself going a bit stir crazy. It seems as if my toddler shares in my sentiments and thus the past few weeks have been difficult to say the least. Based on our current weather forecast, the chance for any relief is looking dismal. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t know if my back or my patience can handle everything that goes along with being confined to a small living space. I’m willing to bet a few of you are feeling the same so, I’ve come up with a “mom quiz” to test your winter sanity. Just in case you’re unsure of whether you are really losing it or just having a bad reaction to the dry air. Don’t forget to score yourself at the end!

Mom Quiz Winter Addition:

You’ve been stuck inside the house with your needy toddler for so long that when they demand a game of hide and seek you:

a)      Gleefully play along! Counting to ten a million times can only improve your pronunciation skills.

b)      Make sure to look EVERYWHERE in the house. Your child will be wickedly amused by their cleverness to outsmart you with their cunning ninja vanishing skills and you get to add steps to your ftibit workout! Bonus!

c)       Start counting loudly and trail off somewhere after two. Grab cell phone and blanket and hide in a lump on the couch. It was your turn to hide right?

d)      Start counting and suddenly remember you heard the mailman drop by a few minutes earlier and rush to the door to hear news from the outside world.

You have all this extra time at home so you can be productive around the house! Do you:

a)      Reorganize the file cabinet, er the stack of papers that have been piling up in that corner of the house no one dares go to.

b)      Finally research healthy, new and exciting dinners and meal plan for a whole month!

c)       Catch up on all the laundry! A dream come true!

d)      Look up after being held captive by your overly clingy toddler for hours doing arts and crafts and realize not only did nothing get done, but the house is a bigger mess than when you started.

You toddler is finally napping and you just sat down on the couch after picking up all of their toys. You see one lowly plastic something or other on the other side of the room obstructing your perfectly clean floor. Do you:

a)      Walk over and pick it up, it will only take a second.

b)      Hope your husband picks it up when he gets home in 4 hours.

c)       Hope your child takes initiative and picks it up after they wake up refreshed from their nap!

d)      Hope your invisible maid picks it up.

e)      Hope one of the dogs finds it and eats it so you have one less toy to worry about.

You have used up all of the arts and crafts supplies and have no other suitable amusements for your child (aka: your child only wants to do arts and crafts). In desperation, you turn to the tv to help. Do you:

a)      Limit screen time to 30 minutes and put on an educational nature show.

b)      Say tv be damned and break out some fabulous finger puppets!

c)       Tie the ipod to your child’s hand and call it a day.

d)      Give in to your child’s demands and watch the only working 45 minutes of the used, warped Monster’s Inc. dvd (that your father-in-law so lovingly salvaged at his neighbor’s yard sale) over and over again.

You are desperate to get out of the house but almost everything is closed and the roads are treacherous. Do you:

a)      Troll Pintrest for some indoor science experiments and hope you have the supplies on hand.

b)      Bundle up your potty training toddler in 5 layers of clothing to go play out in the snow and pray they don’t have an accident in their only pair of snow paints.

c)       Brave the roads and head over to the local Kmart, land of opportunity, wide isles for children to run, and evil shoppers who judge you when they see your child running full speed holding “fragile” glassware down aisle 9.

Did you write down your answers?!?!?! Great!!!! Now to score yourself: add 10 points for every letter you chose and multiply it by infinity cause guess what?!?! There are no right answers when it comes to managing your cabin-fever sanity as a mom (or person in general.) In case it wasn’t glaringly obvious, here are my real life answers: C, D, E, D, and C.

That’s it for this winter addition of the mom sanity quiz! Stay warm and sane everyone!

Rebel Mom

Rebel Mom        

It recently came to my attention that I am not a rule follower (ok that’s not the truth I have known for years.) If you have known me at all my entire life you know, I have rebel tendencies. In other words, I haven’t been a hardcore rule follower. I’m not really a rule breaker, I’m more of the “loosey goosey, it’s up for interpretation” type. You need to microwave something for 10 minutes! (ha, I’m going to do it in 7.) You need to get your oil changed every 3 months (ha, I’m stretching it to 5 months!) And thus you get the idea of my rule breaking agenda. Granted, most of the time, the rules I brake end up coming back to bite me in the but, but I have always refused to be boxed into what society deems correct. Then, I had a kid. Suddenly, rules meant everything! I was in charge of a human being that I had to keep alive! So for months, I researched, scrutinized, and became obsessively paranoid with anything having to do with my baby (being indecisive does not help during this time – or any time- either.)

I have to say that after 9 or 10 months, once she started walking and a lot of the major baby/physical milestones were over, I kind of broke away from my excessive rule following. This was in part due to all of the reading I had done on various subjects. A lot of things said to just let Emma develop on her own and not get frustrated if she didn’t do things by a certain time (I’m glad I followed this advice now, seeing as how she completed all of her baby milestones early and is taking extra time completing the toddler milestones – um potty training and letter recognition much?) I swear Emma is bright, intelligent, and uses the word “actually” on a regular basis but ask her to point to the letter “A” and spoiler alert: it Ain’t happening.

No surprise, I seem to have strayed from my point. Maybe I’m making excuses for it, maybe I am plotting out some wickedly awesome explanation but the long and short of it is, I ignored one big rule. I guess what I am referring to is not so much rule breaking as it is rule bulldozing…. I did not wait for Emma to turn two before I let her watch tv. In fact, by the age of two, she already could recognize a fair amount of tv characters that included Mickey Mouse, Elmo, and the other usual suspects.  I know she started watching before she was one but didn’t really get super into tv shows until closer to 1 ½ or so. The terrible reason for my rule ignoring was not so she could enjoy the wholesome programing that Sesame street has to offer, it was because I needed a break. I needed to cook dinner. I needed to clean the house. We were snowed in for days. I needed a minute to myself to regain my sanity. Really there are a lot of reasons for Emma’s tv consumption that all revolve around me. I will own up to it. I sincerely hope my child does not suffer from depression, obesity, social anxieties, or becomes addicted to television because of my less than desirable tv standards. I watched a lot of tv growing up but I do not attribute it to the majority of my problems as an adult. 

Even though I was lax on the actual age she began to watch, I am a ragging tv dictator the rest of the time. TV is allowed on weekend mornings and every so often during the week (if I am very tired after work or I have a more complicated dinner to put together.) Occasionally, there will be a weekend movie night and when we have a long car trip, Emma will watch a movie. Or, if she is under the weather then I put no limits on sick day tv watching. This is easier to follow in the summer than in the winter. In fact, weekend mornings and the occasional movie is pretty much it for us in the summer.  There have also been times when we have gone completely without tv. Last winter, things spiraled out of control and it seemed like the tv was on all the time. When the majority of your child’s conversations revolve around a Mickey Mouse episode plot then you know you have a problem. Tantrums were had (by both my child and my husband) but we successfully went for weeks without the tv on during the day. It can be done but it is difficult. The other times the tv has gone silent was after a very epic, mean tantrum Emma threw that lasted over an hour one day. The disciplinary action taken was no tv for the entire day (we have not had a major incident like that since.) The other time we had to switch tv watching gears was when Emma picked up the bad attitude of one Donald Duck of the Mousekateer clan. We watched only Sesame street for a month or so afterwards and then slowly but surely, Emma’s precious Mickey Mouse came back. We haven’t had many problems since then and also since then; she has finally expanded her tv show viewing requests to include other things besides Mickey Mouse (that was all she wanted to watch for a VERY long time.)

And there you have it, my take on tv. I’m not writing to say my way is better than anyone else’s. It’s not. I’m writing to commiserate with other mom’s over the decision and let them know what works for our family and maybe to say that if you have figured out the magical harmony of running a household/ raising a child that does not involve some tv viewing then please let me know your secret!

 

The Transition

Hello there! A big hiddy ho 2015! Sorry to be just checking in now but we have been busy doing....not a whole lot. I guess between the blahs of winter and trying to actually figure out a new routine I've been occupied. Also it's been really busy and stressful at work so when I get home I just want to stare at the wall...or a tv show with a ridiculously easy to follow plot. And I am also reeeeeeally trying to finish a book so I can finally read the book my mother-in-law gave me for Christmas that she keeps asking if I've read (please dear lord let that book be a page turner, or we could be discussing it over watermelon in July.)

As far as the routine goes with Emma's new school, I think we are getting pretty settled. Change has always been difficult for me so easing my family into something new while having to adjust myself has been challenging. Surprisingly, Emma has transitioned really well into her new school. Actually, I shouldn't say surprisingly because she is a social butterfly. She has her shy moments but every time we went to visit her new school she ran around like she owned the place and so far, it's still that way. It still feels weird to me not having her in the building with me at work. Not that I ever saw her or anything but I miss having her close, even though she is only about 15 minutes away from my office (10 minutes or less from home - aka: shorter witching hour car ride!)

As far as I can tell from the short periods of time I spend there, the new school is warm and welcoming for her. She has learned new songs and seems to be making new friends (although I still don't know all of their names.) By the time I pick her up, she is in the aftercare room with a bunch of different kids so I haven't met all of her classmates yet which is kind of odd to me since at her last school they were all full time kids so they were together all the time.

We will be attending our first social event at the new place on Friday, they are having a pizza/ movie /pajamas night (they will be screening Frozen of course.) So, I suppose I will have to be social and talk to other parents, which I am terrified of doing, but who knows, I could make a friend. I will be glad to spend more time at the school than just running in and out to pick Emma up. I knew the other daycare so well because I used to go down there every day on my lunch break to see Emma when she was a baby. In doing so, I learned a lot about the staff and the other kids and the parents. I don't have that at the new place which I miss. Also, (it's a blessing and a curse)...they don't hand out sheets of paper with information on them at the end of the day so, I have no idea how many times she went potty or if she napped or what they did in class that day (however they do save trees every day so there's that). I suppose this is where I should stop my working mom hurriedness and actually talk to the people there to see what the goings on are but this requires time and...what's that other thing....oh yeah....effort. Even though the place is closer to home it still takes me the same amount of time to drive over and get her after work and head home. Who knows, maybe I will bond with the teachers and parents over pizza and Frozen.

Other than that 2015 has been ok. I might be lacking in positivity these days but again, the winter blues have me in their icy grip so we shall see how things go for the next bone chilling month. I am really hoping to pop in here at least once a week still. I might try to work on a tv post and a bedtime post so stay tuned for those (but don't hold your breath.) How has your 2015 been so far? How did you adjust to your child going to a new school?