My First Year as a Mom: A Look Back

They say it goes by so fast, but as I ran the sleep deprived marathon what seems like just a few months ago, it almost felt like it would never end, but it has. My first year as a mom is now no more than a memory but a beautiful one. I found strength I didn’t think I had, learned more than I thought I would, at times rolled around on the floor laughing and at times sat balled up crying. It was the ultimate year jam packed with frustrations and exploding with excitement and milestones for myself as well as my child. I am no guru by any means but I thought I would share a few nuggets of wisdom I picked up on my journey:

Time – The best thing I read to describe those first months especially is that the days are long but the years are short. When you get there or if you already have been you know what I mean. I mean when you have a newborn to take care of, laundry to do, dinner to make, and a husband that doesn’t get home until almost 8pm, you catch yourself staring at the clock every few minutes. What seems like hours somehow manifest themselves into minutes. After cuddling a baby, changing diapers, not having any adult interactions, and trying desperately to make sure the baby doesn’t cry, the walls start to close in on you. So in the beginning time goes sooo slow.

Making Decisions and Choices – All of a sudden choosing between which awesome Halloween party to go to is no longer even a blip on the radar of your existence. Choosing which method of relief to offer your teething baby is all you can focus on; amber necklace, teething rings, or teething tablets? There are a million different decisions and choices out there for every milestone. I spent (and still do spend) hours reading up on and getting the most information possible about any and everything. It just sort of becomes part of who you are.

Finding Yourself – I never lost myself really, if anything I was extremely aware of myself through a haze of sleep deprivation, postpartum mommy brain, and the stench of infrequent showering. I mean people tell you your life is going to change but literally one day you are free to come and go and the next thing you know you have to run around the house for a full hour loading bags, packing strollers, and grabbing a million things just to “walk” out the door. You have sudden huge feelings of guilt or worry if you are not around your child and you learn that maternity leave and daycare systems in this country stink. Through all of it though you find your rhythm, you learn what you do and don’t need on an outing, you learn what you feel comfortable with when it comes to parenting, and then eventually, you learn to balance most of it to include a social life, work, pintrest, and parenthood. 

 Doing What Works for You – The experts might say one thing, studies might say another, and everyone has an opinion. Don’t let anyone get you down if you don’t do it the “right” way. We had to formula feed and I couldn’t do skin to skin in after birth but Emma walked at 9 months and is the sweetest snuggler out there. She is healthy, loving, and intelligent so I think we are doing at least something right.

This is just my short list. Everyone has different experiences. Just enjoy it. It does go by way to fast, you can never take enough pictures and never give enough hugs because one day they will be able to walk away from you and that day comes a lot sooner than you think.